Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
Randomize