I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
Randomize
