I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Randomize
