there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
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