Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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