I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
drunk at some random house party. come get me. i thought i pulled my dick out to go piss... it was my left nut. im soaked.
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
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