Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
Randomize
