What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
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