i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
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