Don't look now but I am in class with a mixed drink
Don't look now but my prof just asked me if I was drinking a screwdriver
My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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