I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
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