no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
