the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
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