i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
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