think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
Randomize
