just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize
