I don't think brook has ever known best
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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