Don't you send me to vm
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
Randomize
