Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
The convent might be a nice break from real life
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Randomize
