New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize