And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Randomize
