Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
