If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
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