We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
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