I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
Randomize
