I had new employee orientation at the YMCA today. I showed up with a hangover, a black eye, scratches down my arm, and a sore throat from puking gin and keystone.
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
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