I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
