Christians are straight up FREAKS
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Randomize
