tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
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