There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
Randomize
