She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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