after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
Also, beer. Big fan.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize
