Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
Do I have a sign around my neck that says "SWM desperately seeking ultra-plus-size woman that likes everything I do"? I swear they're organized
No, but you do have a sign around your neck that says "Free cupcakes."
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Randomize
