omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
i would one night stand the shit outta him
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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