Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
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