8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
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