Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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