Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
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