You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Randomize
