I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
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