Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
Everything about him screamed your future.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
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