They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
They took my balls.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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