I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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