At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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