I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
Randomize