Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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