69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
farters have to be the big spoon...
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Randomize
