Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Randomize