am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
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