I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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