Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
Randomize
